Just a Little Thing called Love.

I used to spend every Valentine's Day thinking, "this time, next year, I will have someone to love who loves me back"
and every year, no lucky guy came knocking on my door to sweep me off my feet.
This year was no different.
All my single friends and I counted down the hours we had left to snag a guy to be our valentine's date.

But now I realize, every year I had someone to love who loves me back.
My family.
I came home today to two boxes of chocolates from my mom and dad, a cute handmade card from my sister, and a vase of flowers from my dad.
I started tearing up, being the wuss I am, and now I know what Valentine's Day is about.
You don't need a boyfriend to share your love with; all your family and friends will always be there for you.

Not saying that a vase of roses on my doorstep, or a midnight text saying "Will you be my valentine?" or Taylor Lautner wouldn't be nice, but, you know.
I've got all I need right here.

I love you.

Ocean

You hurt me.
I could feel the pain seeping through my bones.
You stole my breath along the way, but I did not ask for it back until now.
I gave you my blood, the kiss of life, while rushing into it along the way.

But time goes on,
people
slow
down

and maybe thats why, in the end, I had no tears to cry.
I thought you took my world.
But in the end, I knew I was stronger than that.

Maybe I just never really cared.

Cobwebs

One time I had a little girl.
She was my spitting image.
She had a little sister who went swimming,
And dove down far away under the water.

She never came back.

A few years later
She was waiting for me.
The spitting image of her older sister,
But-

This wasn't my little girl;
She had tricked me.

My little girls never came back.

All is Fair in Love and War

Siempre he sido manipuladora.

I hate to face the facts, but it's true. In Love you can get away with anything you like. Practically. Because it usually becomes "love" by that time.

I can get everything I want and use him to get it.
If he's not hot, I tease him and force him to like me, all the while telling everyone else how unfortunate that it is that he likes me.
If he's younger than me, I lead him on as a fun game, until it turns into a sick obsession.
If he's older, hot, smart, and thinks I'm cute, I manipulate him into liking me, then giving him myself in return for all the perks that come with dating the "perfect guy". A seemingly healthy relationship on the surface, but dig deeper and discover that it's a masquerade.

If he's barely older, even hotter, and even smarter, then he changes me.
I'm so used to being in control and getting what I want. But this time, he's strong. Not pathetic. And that makes all the difference. It sounds like a fun game until he shows you what's been missing and how cruel it really is.

It's not myself that changed me.
It's all him.


Thank you. ~

Party On.

"Life is just a party so come as you are"
The wise words of Hannah Montana (or Miley Cyrus...either way they're both sluts)
But really, life is just a party. If you take it too seriously, what's the point of living?
if you don't spend at least a few moments every day to laugh with a friend, or share a smile with someone, then your life might as well be wasted.
Every day, take a moment to stop everything you're doing and ask yourself, "Why am I doing this?"
If you don't have an answer, then maybe consider pursuing a new interest, or find a substantial reason to pursue this task which appears to have no purpose to you.
Also says the phrase, "Never frown, because you never know who may be falling in love with your smile"
So even on days when you're convinced that your life isn't worth living, find something to love and everything changes.



also, I'm going to start a countdown of my progress in life leading up to Valentine's Day, hopefully resulting in something full of love in some type or form.
11 days to go~ talked to a cutie this morning and he made my day :) Had some hotties come to my water polo game, and last night I hung out with an awesome guy friend.