Knife (Repeat)

I hate these kind of mornings
after one of those kind of nights
where you wake up
and your face is kinda swollen and puffy
from tears that have streamed down your cheeks
for hours and hours
the night before.

Where you feel so tired from fighting all night long
so that you've finally given in
because last night you tired all of your emotions
so this morning,
you feel nothing.
You're completely numb.

And I look in the mirror
and I think-
How could someone who loves me so much
Ever be able to hurt me so badly?

Well,
I ask myself this every day.
I don't think it was possible for you to hurt me
in one more way
last night.

Hero [Song]

Hey everyone!
I know I haven't posted in a while (and you know it's bad when every post starts like this one), but I did write a song while I've been gone in Florida and dealing with power outages and other crazy stuff.

For other news, I've started writing a book! It's not so much of a book, though, as a continuous story.  I'm going to try to add a new chapter every week. The link is: theadventuresofzoeysparks.blogspot.com
Here goes!

When we first met I couldn't control my tongue for the life of me
And from that day on until I left
I swore that I would change

I never could've predicted that
you would save my life
But you became my hero
And I never checked twice

And I don't care, because I don't love you anymore

But I will always remember the way you taught me to live

I could never forget how this was real.

Years have past but now we get along better than before
Conversation was never my easiest part
but you gave me a lot to work with

You left an imprint on my brain

Of midnight swims and drinking games 

But this will have to end because

I won't see you again

And I don't care, because I don't love you anymore
But I will always remember the way you taught me to live
I could never forget how this was real.

And maybe I could never have learned this on my own
How everything can be real
when seen in a different light

And I don't care, because I don't love you anymore

But I will always remember the way you taught me to live

I could never forget how this was real.

Circle (Repeat)

I don't really know why I'm thinking about this
a week after it happened
but I am.

I want you to know that when they asked us
who we thought was fearless
I didn't say your name
and for some reason this bothers me now.

I know you'll never see this,
but I'll say it just in case you'll know some how.

I wish you knew that I think you are fearless
even when everyone else thinks of somebody else,
but I think of you
because you're like me,
but only a lot better in every way.

I just wish now that I had spoken up
when I had the chance.

Hero

I wish I could put into words
how much I love things that are real.

The way the birch trees bend in the autumn breeze,
the way the fog rolls in over the lake,
the way the grey sky reflects on the water
enveloping me.

But yet it is soft,
and is the most comfortable blanket I own,

No harsh touch could ever upset the calm nature of these surroundings,
that I long to be a part of.
The tender melting of the sky into the water
and the stark contrast of the trees with the grey
is an image impossible to be captured.

I fall for people
who remind me of these images.
Who has a deep, grey side,
but also a soft, romantic side as well.

These are the people who make me realize
who I want to be
and why I have to change.

Although nothing could ever be as remarkable as the constellation-filled sky,
you come pretty close.

Medusa (Repeat)

I've just spent 2 hours looking at the photos of us
and trying to figure out why my face looks so weird
and why my bra is showing through my shirt in every picture.
I'll blame it on the flash.

I really want to know why he's not here right now,
and why she can't keep the little things to herself,
and wait for something big to happen
to go crying to her mom, who is the only person there for her.
But I don't want to be sucked into her stupid fake drama.

I wonder what she thinks when she looks at me.
If she regrets what she's done.
Or if she would do it again in a heartbeat.
Maybe she judges my face to figure out
if I know.
If I'm upset.
If she's done enough damage yet.
Or maybe she doesn't care about me at all.

But I don't look into her eyes,
because Medusa would turn me into stone.