That Night...

It's so hard trying to figure out how to deal with the people around you,
when everyone is constantly changing.
One day your friend can turn into a backstabber,
and another day someone you've never noticed before can change your life.

But it's these hard decisions that have been making
or breaking
my past few weeks.

First it was her flirtiness,
then it was his kindness,
then it was her way of popping out of nowhere,
then it was his way of making everything okay,
then it was her way of begging for attention,
then it was his way of making me feel so perfect.

But today she threw me for a loophole,
and her actions caused me to falter.
I've completely forgotten how to react,
although every day before this I was making plans
of things to say
and how to fix everything.
But I never did anything.
And now it's too late.

If I had known what she had done yesterday,
I may have joined everyone else in my grade
and sat on the sidelines,
trying not to cry.
But mine actually meant something,
and that's why today was so different.

I've learned how to lose something I've never had.