Rush

The feeling of racing,

when your heart beats so fast 

that it's almost climbing out of your chest

trying to break free,

always happens when I'm with you.

The natural beauties in life sparkle and glisten around me,

but disappear when I'm with you because I can't see anything else

but your eyes.

And when you leave,

and the parting is blissful and reluctant,

the sparking returns 

and flies to my eyes

and I walk with a glisten,

a glow,

a smile,

and it's our little secret.

No one else knows why.

But I've got your trust,

your grin,

and your love in my pocket

to keep for whenever I'm in doubt.

And you'll always be there for me.

Africa

They say when you find love,
it's aways easy, flowing, and magical.
But I beg to differ.

Love is a rough road to drive down,
full of potholes, boulders, bumps, and detours.
But it's not about cheating
and taking an airplane instead;
it's about learning who you are through the journey.

Many say that love is about finding your soulmate,
the perfect person who will always be there for you,
and love you no matter what happens.
But it's not supposed to solely depend on your lover;
it depends on how you change yourself.
A healthy relationship is one where you can see yourself grow,
and blossom,
and grow confidence
and learn who you're supposed to be.

An unhealthy one stops,
cuts off the flow of blood,
until all circulation ceases.

All I ever wanted from you
was to have you love me,
but now I know better.
I really need you to lead me down the path
of self-discovery,
and I think I chose you correctly.
Please don't prove me wrong.

Champagne

First off, I just wanna say check out the band Let's Get It cause they're awesome possum.
(my favorites are Do Not Disturb and Duck Duck Grey Goose)

And now I'm going to reflect on the past year.  I was thinking today about the Pet and Hobby Show on Friday, and that brought back some screwed up memories from last year.
I can't 
scratch that. I don't want to go back there. ever again.

Anyways,
I basically have nothing to say today except:
~Boys suck. Don't trust them.
~If you don't receive immediate results, stick with what you're doing and in time it'll pay off.
~Friends can be found in the weirdest places.
~Don't judge people based on what other people think of them, judge them by what you think of them.
~Life isn't Life until you start Living it.

goodnight.

Why?

Wow.
I can't even count the number of days I've been in denial.
And now I know it's true.
How could I not see the inevitability of me falling in love with you?
It's incredible.
And late...

If only I had realized this sooner,
before I was rejected a few weeks ago.
When you were always the one who would
dance with me,
talk to me,
walk with me,
laugh with me,
and hug me,
when I was the one who accepted it without second thoughts.

But when I hurt,
and you weren't there,
it deepened the suffering by a million times.
You will never understand the depth to which I dreamt late at night
of only one chance to make things right with you.
Broken fragments,
floating above my head,
of the times we spent together happily.
I miss those carefree summer dog days.

I can only wish that I could've known sooner.
It took a lot of pain to realize how much you meant to me,
but I needed to suffer to figure this out.

Rejection.

I saw that picture of you,
and I had a flashback to that night,
and I remembered everything that happened,
and how much I liked you.
I can't believe this is the same person.
Was I nobody?
I thought I was somebody,
but you pick her back up like she never left you.

I hate her.

But I shouldn't
because I don't like you,
yet I'm still jealous.

I thought I was better.
She's ugly.
She's a slut.
She's stupid.
And she's also your type I guess.
I can do so much better than sink down to this type you have,
so why am I stuck?

No matter what type of rejection,
it will always hurt.
Always.